Father Time Petition
Alright, I’ve had enough! Why is it that when it rains it pours and when it’s sunny it’s a darn heat wave? With baby #2 now safely home and thriving (well, actually sleeping about 18-20 hours a day right now – go ahead, be jealous), I am now ready to dig back into my work. What I’m finding is that, by the time I get really rolling it’s already on the dark side of midnight. I’ve decided to appeal to The Man directly:
Dear Father Time,
You suck. For the first 8 or so years of life I hated you because I was too young to do anything cool. For the next 7 or so years I hated you because I was too young to drive. Once I was finally old enough to drive I hated you because I wasn’t 19 yet. From 19 until 29 I was pretty happy. There, I admitted it. Now that I’ve crossed 30 and have two kids I hate you again. Sure, for the first 19 years of life I asked you to speed things up and to shorten the days but why did you wait 29 years to listen?
Since I’m a reasonable guy I’m not going to ask for much. All I want is for one more hour in the day. That’s right, just add a 25th hour in the day. Don’t worry about watches or analog clocks – they’re on their way out anyway.
And don’t play around and just try to cram 25 into the space where 24 were before – I’m on to your ways. I’m also on to something else that may influence your decision to climb aboard the 25 hour train. That’s right, I know about the Tooth Fairy. If you don’t want Mother Nature to find out whose pillow she’s been visting then you’ll find a way to make this happen.
Cordially yours,
Jacob
